Halloween Night
By: Sydney Healy
Where was everybody? I looked all around the house but I didn't find anyone or anything. So I finally went to go check in the creepy moist and scary garage. The car was still there, so no one had left but I heard a very faint noise coming from inside the car. I started to shake so hard and my costume began to feel extra hot and itchy. I slowly walked towards the door to the front seat of the car, then quickly and swiftly opened it. the noise that sounded like eating stopped instantly. It sounded like it was coming from the back seat so I climbed over the seats till I got to the back one, but nothing was there. I knew it was somewhere back here so I dipped my head over the seat and saw a big blanket.
That's when I got really scared and thought about running inside and watching Netflix under my bed with a pillow and blanket. I decided that this time I would face my fears. I mean what could really happen that would be so bad? Maybe there was a dead body under the blanket or a person who was ready to snatch me and drive me and this car very very very far away so that we will never ever ever ever be seen again by anyone, or a zombie, vampire, witch, goblin, or a ware wolf. I mean anything could happen after all it was Halloween night. I decided I was thinking too much and I just needed to pull the blanket. I quickly lifted it only to find my mom munching on tons of my Halloween candy. She looked at me worried and said with her mouth full of candy,"Please don't tell anyone. I will take you shopping!"
That was so good!! I liked how you made it super funny at the end! I couldn't find any mistakes! Keep up the great work!!:)
ReplyDeleteSyd THIS WAS AMAZING1!!!! I just saw a few run on sentences but thats all! Keep up the AWESOME WRITING!:)
ReplyDeleteThat was a great story! The only thing that I noticed was that you did not capitalize "the noise" and it was the beginning of the sentence. That was seriously the only mistake that I could find though.
ReplyDeleteGreat plot and humorous ending! Add more details to paint a picture in your reader's mind. You did so many things right here, good work! Thanks!
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