Halloween With the Wolves
My brother and I were walking through the woods one Halloween night when we saw what appeared to be a short-cut. "Let's go that way," my brother said. We looked again to the other side and decided to just take the short-cut anyway. It was really late out and the other path looked darker and scarier than the this one. We started walking and after about ten minutes heard a noise. "Snap!" Someone was in the woods behind us, following us. My brother and I turned around but all we could see was the dark outline of trees. We heard it again, "Snap!" the sound of a twig breaking. I could feel my heart rate start to speed up. My brother shivered in fear and said, "Maybe we should've taken the other way. It probably wouldn't have been so scary." I just shook my head and stated, "Well we're already too far to head back, and besides I don't think you'd want to run into whoever is following us." We kept going and tried to subtly speed up our pace. Next thing we knew, there was a howl not far behind us.
We stopped dead in our tracks. "Is that what I think it is?" My brother said, "I don't know." I answered back, "But I hope not." We continued on but the smell of dog breath was getting closer and closer as we walked. We started halfway jogging, we didn't want to attract too much attention to whoever it was that was following us so we didn't go into a full sprint. We hadn't heard them in a while because the sound of the wolf had scared us to the point that we'd completely forgotten about the man. Suddenly, I heard a running noise behind us. I looked behind my shoulder and saw two piercing green eyes bouncing up and down, and the sound of panting close behind us. The wolf was on our trail. I was scared out of my mind but I didn't want to be eaten by the wolf so I yelled to my brother, "RUN!" He looked back and started to sprint, his eyes full of shock and fear probably matching mine. We both started to cry, tears streaming down our face. "Mommy, daddy!" My brother was whispering as we ran. I looked behind us again and saw that the wolf was joined by two other ones. All of them had bright green eyes that you could see through the darkness. While I was looking over my shoulder, I tripped over a stone and fell. My brother looked back and yelled at me to get up. I looked back and was almost frightened out of my socks, the wolves were almost onto me! I was petrified from fear. "What am I going to do?" I thought to myself. Just then, a man came running from the side of the woods. He looked a bit familiar but since it was dark I couldn't see him clearly.
The man came out with a small log and yelled at the wolves. This gave me time to get up and run after my brother, scared out of my wits but grateful of the distraction the man provided. "We have to find a way home," I said to my brother, "Or we'll never make it out alive." The man started to back up slowly, still yelling at the wolves. It was just then that I figured out that he was the one that had been following us, but who was he and why did he look so familiar? The light-bulb clicked as I realized that it had been our dad, following us to make sure we wouldn't get hurt but also trying not to ruin our fun night. "Well, he did but not on purpose. And he did save me so I have to give him that." I thought as we ran for our lives. We finally made it to the end of the trail and found a sign pointing to our cabin's neighborhood. I steered my brother toward that direction and stopped to take a breath for a little. "You can wait with me for a few minutes if you want, I'm waiting for dad to come." "That man that saved you was daddy?" I had forgotten to tell my brother that the man was dad. He was completely astonished. "Yup, and he is the best dad ever on the worst night ever." We waited for a few minutes when he finally came around the bend, breathing heavily and sweating from running so much without stopping. My brother and I ran into him and gave him a bear hug. "Thank you dad, you scared us earlier when you stepped on the twigs though!" He took a few deep breaths and said, "Well, I didn't know what would happen when I sent my two young boys out alone to trick-or-treat. Though I definitely did not expect this!" I wasn't sure if I would ever feel the same about coming back to the cabin after this, but I sure was glad my dad was there to help us. We walked down the trail to where our mom and baby sister were waiting for us. The rest of the night was nice, and in the morning we packed up our bags to go back home. We were done with the woods for now.
By: Daisy Jessop
We stopped dead in our tracks. "Is that what I think it is?" My brother said, "I don't know." I answered back, "But I hope not." We continued on but the smell of dog breath was getting closer and closer as we walked. We started halfway jogging, we didn't want to attract too much attention to whoever it was that was following us so we didn't go into a full sprint. We hadn't heard them in a while because the sound of the wolf had scared us to the point that we'd completely forgotten about the man. Suddenly, I heard a running noise behind us. I looked behind my shoulder and saw two piercing green eyes bouncing up and down, and the sound of panting close behind us. The wolf was on our trail. I was scared out of my mind but I didn't want to be eaten by the wolf so I yelled to my brother, "RUN!" He looked back and started to sprint, his eyes full of shock and fear probably matching mine. We both started to cry, tears streaming down our face. "Mommy, daddy!" My brother was whispering as we ran. I looked behind us again and saw that the wolf was joined by two other ones. All of them had bright green eyes that you could see through the darkness. While I was looking over my shoulder, I tripped over a stone and fell. My brother looked back and yelled at me to get up. I looked back and was almost frightened out of my socks, the wolves were almost onto me! I was petrified from fear. "What am I going to do?" I thought to myself. Just then, a man came running from the side of the woods. He looked a bit familiar but since it was dark I couldn't see him clearly.
The man came out with a small log and yelled at the wolves. This gave me time to get up and run after my brother, scared out of my wits but grateful of the distraction the man provided. "We have to find a way home," I said to my brother, "Or we'll never make it out alive." The man started to back up slowly, still yelling at the wolves. It was just then that I figured out that he was the one that had been following us, but who was he and why did he look so familiar? The light-bulb clicked as I realized that it had been our dad, following us to make sure we wouldn't get hurt but also trying not to ruin our fun night. "Well, he did but not on purpose. And he did save me so I have to give him that." I thought as we ran for our lives. We finally made it to the end of the trail and found a sign pointing to our cabin's neighborhood. I steered my brother toward that direction and stopped to take a breath for a little. "You can wait with me for a few minutes if you want, I'm waiting for dad to come." "That man that saved you was daddy?" I had forgotten to tell my brother that the man was dad. He was completely astonished. "Yup, and he is the best dad ever on the worst night ever." We waited for a few minutes when he finally came around the bend, breathing heavily and sweating from running so much without stopping. My brother and I ran into him and gave him a bear hug. "Thank you dad, you scared us earlier when you stepped on the twigs though!" He took a few deep breaths and said, "Well, I didn't know what would happen when I sent my two young boys out alone to trick-or-treat. Though I definitely did not expect this!" I wasn't sure if I would ever feel the same about coming back to the cabin after this, but I sure was glad my dad was there to help us. We walked down the trail to where our mom and baby sister were waiting for us. The rest of the night was nice, and in the morning we packed up our bags to go back home. We were done with the woods for now.
By: Daisy Jessop
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ReplyDeleteThis is amazing Daisy! This passage had me entertained while reading it! The only thing that I don't like is the small words part but I can see that you can't change the size, well anyways, see ya!
ReplyDeleteI finally figured out how to change the size because before when I tried a lot then it wouldn't work. Thanks Jack!
ReplyDeleteThis is awesome! I love how smoothly your story flowed. Also great use of words I can definitely see why you're in this class! Just watch your punctuation a little more. Everything else was great!
ReplyDeleteThose are quotation marks, Averi! Not parenthesis, Haha!
ReplyDeleteWay to go Daisy! This was a fun story to read. I like the flow and it almost sounded like a fairy tale. Good word choices as well. There is some weirdness with your punctuation but that will be an easy fix. Add more detail too. Good work!
ReplyDeleteThanks guys! It's nice that you were all kind about the mistakes I made, next time I'll make sure to re-read my work before submitting. Thanks again! :D
ReplyDelete